Oh, No, I Pray, Do Not Depart!

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Sorry, Mom. But when a man marries, he leaves his father and mother and becomes one with his wife Matthew They are a team, one unit, unified in spirit. Can you imagine praying for the right side of your body and not the left? The same is true of you and your husband.

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If you pray for yourself and not him, you will never find the blessings and fulfillment you want. He gives us whatever we will fall for, whether it be low self-esteem, pride, the need to be right, miscommunication, or the bowing to our own selfish desires. In every broken marriage, there is at least one person whose heart is hard against God.

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We only see the way it is, not the way God wants it to become. When we pray, however, our hearts become soft toward God and we get a vision.


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We see there is hope. We have faith that He will restore all that has been devoured, destroyed, and eaten away from the marriage. We can trust Him to take away the pain, hopelessness, hardness, and unforgiveness. We are able to envision His ability to resurrect love and life from the deadest of places. The joy of seeing something hopelessly dead brought to life is the greatest joy we can know.

The power that resurrected Jesus is the very same power that will resurrect the dead places of your marriage and put life back into it.

Saint Jude Thaddeus

We have to go through the pain to get to the joy. We have to believe the part of your relationship that has been eaten away by pain, indifference, and selfishness can be restored. We have to trust that God is big enough to accomplish all this and more. He can heal the wounds and put love back in your heart.

Nothing and no one else can. Lift us out of the pit of unforgiveness. Speak through us so that our words reflect Your love, peace, and reconciliation. Tear down this wall between us and teach us how to walk through it. Enable us to rise up from this paralysis and move into the healing and wholeness You have for us. Ask God to give you a new husband or a new wife. He is able to take the one you have and make him or her a new creation in Christ.

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Husbands and wives are not destined to fight, emotionally disconnect, live in marital deadness, be miserable, or divorce. We can fight for them in prayer and not give up, because as long as we are praying, there is hope. With God, nothing is ever as dead as it seems. Not even your own feelings. I learned that the best things for my marriage was for me to have women prayer partners with whom I prayed every week. I now believe this is vital for any marriage.

If you can find two or more strong faith-filled people whom you thoroughly trust, and with whom you can share the longings of your heart, set up a weekly prayer time. It will change your life. In fact, I wrote it for myself as much as I wrote it for you. Many days I find life difficult rather than easy, complex rather than simple, potentially dangerous rather than safe, and exhausting rather than exhilarating.

But I have come to know that God can smooth my path, calm the storms, keep me and all I care about safe, and even make my way simple when I ask Him to carry the complexities of life for me. Not without prayer. Or we only pray about the most pressing issues and neglect to take the time to really get close to God, to know Him better, and to share with Him the deepest longings of our heart.

In our pray-and-run existence, we shut off the very avenue by which He brings blessings into our lives. And we risk waking up one day with that empty, insecure feeling in the pit of our stomach frightening us with the thought that our foundation may be turning into sand and our protective armor may be becoming as fragile as an eggshell.

Psalm 34 Taste and See

This is what happened to me. A number of years ago, I had become so busy with working, taking care of teenagers, trying to be a good wife, running a home, writing books and traveling to promote them, being at all church meetings, helping people who needed it, and trying to make everyone happy, that I neglected the most important thing—my intimate walk with God. Actually, I was praying more than ever about everyone else on the planet. I read for hours as I did research in the Scriptures for different projects I was working on and the Bible study classes I was taking.

I was busy doing good and neglected to do what was best. I became Martha instead of Mary without even realizing it Luke I felt like that eggshell, as if I could be crushed with very little outside pressure. I knew I needed more of God in my life, and nothing on earth was more important than that. And I came to realize how important it was for me to guard and protect my personal relationship with God in prayer.

It will keep us focused on who God is and who He made us to be.

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It will lift our eyes from the temporal to the eternal and show us what is really important. It will give us the ability to distinguish the truth from a lie. It will strengthen our faith and encourage us to believe for the impossible. So I was willing to endure those uncomfortable moments for the benefits that followed. Eventually, the prayer circles became an important part of my life, and I even began to look forward to them.

I planned during the week what I would ask people to pray for me about on Sunday. Once I started seeing answers to those prayers, I was hooked. I realized it was probably the only time anyone on earth was praying for me, and if I had not told the people in my prayer circle about my prayer needs, no one would have known. On a few very rare occasions when the prayer circles did not happen, I was actually disappointed. As time went on, I grew more and more attached to the prayer circles. Not only were prayers being answered, but there was also a bonding that was happening between the people.

I would see someone in church with whom I had prayed in the previous weeks, and I remembered their names and what their needs were. And people I had not known before meeting them in a prayer circle would also come up and ask about me. We have been taught that we can have intimacy, access, friendship with God — and these things are true. However, our God is still holy, and sin is serious. We are in very different circumstances than Nehemiah — a different land, a different people, a different covenant… but we have the same God, and sin is still ever-present!

There is much we can learn from Nehemiah about godly intercession. When I heard these things, I sat down and wept. For some days I mourned and fasted and prayed before the God of heaven. Nothing is too difficult for me. There is, indeed, nothing too difficult for me. Nothing is too hard for me. Brenton Septuagint Translation I am the Lord, the God of all flesh: shall anything be hidden from me! Matthew But Jesus looked at them and said, "With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.


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